An active, empathetic approach to leading others can build trust, deepen relationships and uncover opportunities. The focus needs to be on constant improvement in the Art of Listening. Having said that, there’s more to consider. We seem caught in the whirlwind of our digital age; every moment feels like it’s moving at double-speed, in a rush, and we shortchange ourselves on genuine connections. “The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them” (Ralph Nichols).
Communication, not Credentials, is the better currency in business leadership. Improving communication benefits everyone. It encourages creating relationships and exercising much-needed trust. Everyone wants to know they matter, that they are valued, that they have a voice and are being heard.
So, what do companies do? Committees are formed for the purpose of studying better ways to communicate. Taskforces are created. The Suggestion Box is once again stuffed with notes that attempt to answer the same request for better communication ideas throughout the company and across the board. This works, at first, and for a short while. Leadership’s push for better communication amongst the troops gets results. People slow down their process just a little before accelerating to meet productivity goals. Will it last? It’s anybody’s guess. For those who have been with a company for a time, this is history repeating itself: They’ve been down this road before.
What is needed is a concentrated effort; the kind of intentional, empathetic listening that builds trust, diffuses anxiety, and strengthens relationships. It cannot be learned in a day or a weekend any more than every point in my book, The Way of The Conscientious Connector, can be instantly internalized. This is a practice that requires vigilance, commitment of upper management and a concentrated effort from everyone.
Old habits must be replaced with behaviors that will serve the person and the company. For this approach to be of lasting value, it has to replace the current culture: Good Communication skills are the engine that drives everything else, from Productivity to Customer Relations to Creativity and the rest. It transforms how you show up. It shifts the culture of the company for long-term results. Economically, socially and emotionally, the only constant is this: The timeless, transformational Art of Listening is at the center of everything.
Whether you’re running a company, working with a team, or navigating family dynamics, your ability to listen with presence and purpose determines how effectively you can lead. It is not just about having all the answers; it’s about asking the right questions and genuinely caring about the answers you receive.
Shifting leadership from just being a series of directives to effective collaboration begins with empathetic listening. It signals safety. It encourages contribution. It fosters innovation and opens the door to deeper connections. This approach can often lead to unexpected solutions and opportunities because people respond more favorably. Cultivating a “listening leadership” approach, whether at work or at home, can have a positive impact. It’s more than just surface-level communication, however.
Try these suggestions on for size. They may seem too obvious, too simple, too logical, but they’re loaded with opportunities to stand out from everyone else.
1. Pause to Reflect Before Responding
After a person has spoken, pause and reflect; then, repeat what you heard, including any frustrations. Don’t focus on insignificant details. Instead, try to capture the meaning of what is being said, so there are no misunderstandings. Ask the person if you have that right or if you need further information. Let words settle in. People often make unclear statements. Resist jumping in too quickly or speaking over people. The best insights usually happen in that quiet space. People will likely provide greater clarification if you give them the space. They might tell you even more.
Active-listening confirms that you have captured their thoughts, ideas and/or emotions accurately. It sends the message that you take them seriously. It helps the other person feel heard, validated. Taking a few minutes to do this can eliminate misunderstandings that could blossom into a full grievance and poor productivity for months or even years to come.
2. Listen for Emotion
Pay attention to non-verbal cues: 65% of communication is unspoken. You can learn a lot about people by the way they communicate. Talking fast, for instance, could be a sign of nervousness or anxiety. If they talk slowly, they may be tired of trying to choose their words carefully. During active listening, your non-verbal behaviors are just as important. To show that you are truly tuned in and interested, use open, non-threatening body language. This involves smiling while listening, leaning in, nodding at key junctures, and not folding your arms. Pay attention to your facial expressions too, so you don’t convey any type of resistance or negativity to what you are hearing.
We know that tone, facial expression, and word choices reveal more than just facts. Listening with empathy allows you to address the real concern, not just the surface topic, so allow room for it in the conversation.
3. Ask Follow-Up Questions
Questions that require only a ‘Yes’ or a ‘No’ aren’t helpful, and they keep the conversation from flowing. There’s not much to gain. Asking open-ended questions will always serve you better. It gets the other person to talk more. It requires them to form their thoughts, consider what they are about to say and be fully present. “Can you tell me more about that?” or “How do you think you could have responded differently?” will elicit more explanation and cause the other person to really think about their answer. This encourages thoughtful, expansive responses and will help to deepen your connection to the person or group.
Then, you become the listener who cares, which is demonstrated by your patience and encouragement for the other person to have the floor for as long as it takes. “When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen” (Ernest Hemingway).
In my profession, I help people communicate, connect, and collaborate at a higher level. I’ve seen this principle in action time and again: Those who master the art of active listening rise above the noise. They build bridges. They instill trust. They offer kindness in meeting people right where they are. In turn, this atmosphere helps raise productivity, something every company wants. Lead by Actively Listening, no matter what your position.
